Allen has lived in Mississippi for almost 5 years. We moved here after Greg & I got married, Sept. 3, 2005. Allen was 16 1/2 years old.
At 18 he wanted to move out of the house and be on his own. We had set stipulations for his moving, including completing his Eagle Scout Badge. We honestly never thought he would complete it. But, he did on his 18th birthday, nothing like cutting it close! Since we had set the "rules" for moving, and he did each and every one of them, we stuck by our decision and "let" him move out.
It took me along time to get used to this and I found the very best way to cope with this, is to pray, ask the Lord to protect him, and trust that he will. Its worked pretty well except for the episodes where he temporarily moved back home. That has become way harder for me than him being gone. If he is here, then I stress about what time he has to be at work, when does he get off, is he eating here, what is he doing at night, etc. If he doesn't live here, then I don't worry about it as much because I am not "seeing" it on a daily basis.
But now comes the big move. I have been expecting it for several years. But it doesn't make it any easier. My 2nd born son is moving to Georgia this weekend. He will be sharing an apartment with a friend of his and is transferring his job to a Chili's there. We've talked, I've prayed and yes, fretted! Maybe this move will be good for him. Maybe it will cause him to trust his own instincts and judgments & take care and responsibility for himself (he is pretty good at this already, but needs some fine-tuning). And the big MAYBE is...maybe his mama will get used to this move (don't count in it!)
So, I am trusting that the Lord will take care of Allen. I am trusting that he will draw Allen closer to him. I am trusting that Allen will flourish and enjoy being back in his "home state". I am trusting that the Lord will give me the "nerves of steel" to live without him in Mississippi.
Mama asked me yesterday if I had cried yet. I said NO, but I am now!
I love you, Allen!
And yes, part of my heart is moving back to GA.
At 18 he wanted to move out of the house and be on his own. We had set stipulations for his moving, including completing his Eagle Scout Badge. We honestly never thought he would complete it. But, he did on his 18th birthday, nothing like cutting it close! Since we had set the "rules" for moving, and he did each and every one of them, we stuck by our decision and "let" him move out.
It took me along time to get used to this and I found the very best way to cope with this, is to pray, ask the Lord to protect him, and trust that he will. Its worked pretty well except for the episodes where he temporarily moved back home. That has become way harder for me than him being gone. If he is here, then I stress about what time he has to be at work, when does he get off, is he eating here, what is he doing at night, etc. If he doesn't live here, then I don't worry about it as much because I am not "seeing" it on a daily basis.
But now comes the big move. I have been expecting it for several years. But it doesn't make it any easier. My 2nd born son is moving to Georgia this weekend. He will be sharing an apartment with a friend of his and is transferring his job to a Chili's there. We've talked, I've prayed and yes, fretted! Maybe this move will be good for him. Maybe it will cause him to trust his own instincts and judgments & take care and responsibility for himself (he is pretty good at this already, but needs some fine-tuning). And the big MAYBE is...maybe his mama will get used to this move (don't count in it!)
So, I am trusting that the Lord will take care of Allen. I am trusting that he will draw Allen closer to him. I am trusting that Allen will flourish and enjoy being back in his "home state". I am trusting that the Lord will give me the "nerves of steel" to live without him in Mississippi.
Mama asked me yesterday if I had cried yet. I said NO, but I am now!
I love you, Allen!
And yes, part of my heart is moving back to GA.
Oh, I don't know what to say. I can imagine it, but I know that's not as worse as the real thing.
ReplyDeleteYour trust is in the right place. He will help and comfort you and He will guide Allen.
I'm here and I love you!
Bless your heart, it is certainly a mom thing. He sounds like a real good boy, and you've done well by him. I wonder sometimes how my mom ever let me out of the house. Then I think, well, I did it so why can't my son get out on his own before long? And about that time I have to quit thinking about it too much, or I think I'll scare myself. We spent so many years trying to out-think everything that could go wrong so we can protect our little kids and keep the bad things away from them; now we have to turn it over to them to think for themselves and look ahead. All us moms can do is pray without ceasing. And I think boys really need their moms to be brave, too. They want to know they'll be missed, but they need to know we think they can handle it (with or without mistakes). Best wishes! You hang in there, now! Bet you'll be real proud of him. Sounds like a winner to me. ~Liz
ReplyDeleteOh, Donna, this is heart wrenching. I can not even imagine how hard this is for you. I have another friend who told me this week her oldest son (23) is moving out. She is having a tough time also. I will be praying that God will give you peace and that He will draw your sweet boy closer to Him!!
ReplyDeleteI don't know what to say. I remember wanting to go back to TN so badly after we moved. It was home. This is exciting for Allen but very sad and nerve-racking for you. We'll be praying for Allen and you. Will his new place be near Granny and family? I hope so.
ReplyDelete